This is why the most influential leaders don’t know anything

This year’s been extreme for many people. We’ve either been struggling with so many different changes or racing faster than we ever have.

We had a great time learning about leaders NOT knowing all the answers — and being okay with it — at our FREE live webinar last week.

I intentionally held onto this one until our very last webinar for the year because a huge part of the work we do in LIFT is communication and trust building.

Incidentally, psychological safety, a very related and hot 🔥 topic for 2020 which we’ve been talking about a lot over the past 3 years, comes up with almost every client I deal with. Whether I’m working with teams from mental health services, general health provision, corrective services; regardless of being country-based or city-based; across corporate, not-for-profit and public sectors; this has been a common theme.

In a nutshell, we need to find the courage to make the connections that create psychological safety at work. With this in place, we can begin to build trust, and that trust allows us to collaborate and start to innovate in an agile way. We simply can’t achieve any of this without, first, the willingness to be vulnerable.

You probably won’t be surprised to know that not having all the answers, and allowing your team and others know that (gasp!) is just about the most vulnerable a leader can be… but also the most influential.

When we realise we don’t know the answers to whatever challenge has made its way to us that particular day —  or that someone’s going to notice or call us on it — we feel embarrassed, our imposter syndrome kicks in. I reckon we’re never more vulnerable than when we do this.

So, the teaser for my FREE webinar was this:

Successful leaders don’t know all the answers. Purposefully.

And I meant it.

Because, what if you’re seen as more professional, not less, by NOT knowing all the answers?

In fact, if you knew every answer to every question you’re asked, every day, then maybe you’re not leading… maybe you’re managing.

(And you and I know that successful leaders don’t manage, they engage and influence).

Being okay with NOT knowing it all, lets your team step up, creates accountability, and empowers them to be actively engaged. (I talk about servant leadership and being on the path / getting on the bus, in the webinar: all journey-type analogies because that’s what this is, and I heavily emphasise them because it’s a key part of being a true leader).

To those leaders that I work with who still believe they should know all the answers, I say: “And how’s that working out for you so far?”

Because it’s a recipe for leader burnout, shame, focusing on our failures and never being good enough.

Because your shields come up and connection, with yourself and everyone else, goes down.

In this, the Year of the Pandemic, something none of us ever saw or prepared for before, there’s no way we could know all the answers. So, if nothing else, consider taking on board the lessons it has to teach us. We need to let go of the pressure to control, to be right, to fix things, to be The All-knowing Problem Solver in every situation. Clearly, 2020 has taught us we can’t know it all, and we shouldn’t even try.

Instead, we can be the relatable and vulnerable empowering leader who lets their team be part of the action and decision making, not just telling them what to do but asking them for their views and thoughts.

In my experience of working with teams during COVID, the teams that have thrived, united together as a team, admitted they didn’t know all the answers, built trust in the process, and worked to problem solve together. They found solutions based on “more heads” around the problem and came out the other side feeling strong and resilient. (Many of those teams continue to work with LIFT to figure out how they can replicate this forever!)

Others didn’t thrive so much (and we’re working with some of these teams to build their courage to connect and their ability to be diversely agile).

If you’d like to find out why, and how, trusted leaders are purposefully don’t know all the answers, please watch my webinar recording (👆 head to the top of this post!)

In just 31 minutes, you’ll explore a load of tips and tools which cover:

• Why lobbying is not a dirty word and why you should lobby your team ahead of any discussion
• Understanding the difference between knowing and learning — and the key questions that’ll help you identify which you’re doing at any time
• Why we talk too much in low performance conversations (and how to practically guarantee improvement)
• The two words that’ll change your life.

If you joined me in any of my LIVES in 2020: thank you; it’s great getting to share my favourite #connectionkindness tools and being part of interesting, sometimes mind-blowing, conversations. And if you haven’t yet, keep an eye out for my 2021 series and make sure you join us!

Two quick plugs🔌

Check out, my Little Lifts Toolkit eBook, The Courage to Create Connection, which is still available in the Resources section of my website.

It’s got my Top 10 favourite tools to create connection (essential for anyone who wants to grow their leadership practice).

Would it make a great Christmas gift 🎄 for yourself or a leader (current or aspiring) that you know?

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And, how about heading into 2021 without any conflict baggage (yes, it’s possible!)

Get your (digital) hands on my self-paced online course co-taught with Dr Samantha Hardy.

You could go through the material whilst on Christmas break, or take advantage of the quiet(er) time, and head back to your workplace, freed from constant complicated conflict, no longer fearing, or feeling bad after, conflict.

If you don’t get a break or quiet time — or would rather spend it doing other things, including nothing 🙌🏼 (can I get an “Amen”?!) — you’ve got 12 months to access all the materials.

PJs approved learning: for the win!

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