I've lost up to 70% of my voice

This post is part of LIFT's 7 part #ConnectionKindness series 
For Tip #1, click here | For Tip #2, click here

Now that we can’t make any physical contact with each other at work, in our extended families, or in our communities, are you finding it a little awkward at the start and end of meetings or social online conversations? Yeah, me too.

It’s definitely no surprise that we’re feeling Zoom and other platforms just aren’t the same. Without that handshake or easily made eye contact, we’re feeling the disconnection gap! A gap that’s created by lack of body language.

Depending on which model you read, this gap can be between 55% and 70%!  That’s a big chunk of our message NOT being communicated. Just because you can “see” someone on Zoom doesn’t mean the gap’s not there.

^{[Image: Thanks Miguel A Padrinan via Pexels]}

Consider: what are you “saying” when you shake hands with someone or you’re standing close enough to easily make quick direct eye contact?

“I’m so pleased to meet you! I’ve been waiting so long for this meeting. It’s great to finally get in a room together. This meeting is going to be great. I trust you.”

When we touch someone on the arm or we hug them, we might be saying:

“I understand. I’m here for you. I enjoyed our time together. I hope you’ll be alright. I’m so excited for you. You did a great job.”

Some of us are not naturally lost for words (!) but all of us use these physical (non-verbal) gestures alongside our verbal communication to underscore and emphasise what our words are saying.

Which means that without them, we’ve got to get vulnerable and SAY our feelings. Or as my friend says to her three year old: “Use your words!”

💬 Gulp!

YES, this is uncomfy for ALL of us. But we’re all in this together and I promise you, if you actually do use your words MORE than in the past — and any other gestures, signals, fun tools or crazy movements — it’ll create an atmosphere that feels more connected, where it’s okay to be imperfect in this unknown new world, and where we can share what’s been working or what’s crashed and burned.

That feeling is camaraderie — being connected to one another in times of crisis, supporting each other, and it’s built on #ConsciousVulnerability and #ConnectionKindness… which we all need to stay connected while we’re physically not.

So get focused on your body language, and be mindful of your facial expression, eye contact and tone of voice more than ever. Because without these elements that we previously took for granted, we could be losing up to 70% of our message AND our opportunity to effectively connect in this new world 🌏. Yes, one where we’re all more physically separated, working and socialising online a lot (and often we’re all very very TINY on the screen!)

So please enjoy my #ConnectionKindness Tip 3 video on Language at the top of this post  and let’s get super-good at our “non-verbs” and embrace the awkwardness!

PPS: Don’t forget to join our FREE Courage Creators Community on Facebook. You don’t want to miss our next Live on Tuesday 28 April at 8 pm where we’re talking about Listening to your Grandmother: How to build a sense of safety, unity and trust by talking less.

PPS: If you’re a leader who needs a super-quick leadership battery recharge of clarity, calm and courage, in a 30 minute online session (read: very little downtime, massive ROI), you need to sign up for Connection Wellness Coaching. We’re offering one-off and value packages to support you in this unprecedented time of change, challenge and opportunity to innovate. Don’t lead through this alone; find out more here.